Part of our agenda at many board meetings includes a report from members of the Helpmate staff.  We have heard first hand what is like to help someone through the myriad steps required to protect and free themselves from an abusive spouse.  We learn what it is like for the overnight staff in a shelter full of wounded (emotionally and physically) women and children.  We hear how difficult and yet rewarding it is to go out in the community to ask for funds to continue Helpmate's mission, competing with so many other agencies in Buncombe County doing their own fine work.

One recent program that especially affected me was hearing, not from an employee, but from a young woman, who with her three children came through the program to protect and free herself from an abusive spouse and to take a productive place in society.  This brave lady eagerly volunteered to tell us her story of what it is really like in the day to day living in our shelter.

We heard of her decision to leave a difficult and unfixable relationship and how she worked with Helpmate to weave her way through the court system, engage in counseling session with other women in like situations, and complete training to ready herself for her first job experience.  And, we were informed about the day to day living with so many other women and their children in our shelter.

We heard how it is to try and cook a familiar dinner for her children on a four burner stove, with many other women trying to do the same thing at the same time.  Ditto on the one microwave and oven.  We were reminded, that people being what they are, tasks like emptying the dishwasher, are not always done by the person whose turn it is. 

And getting the washing machine and dryer (which run literally 24/7) all to yourself - takes quite a bit of luck and planning.  But the most difficult task was sharing a bathroom with another young women and her three children - when each mother had a toddler being toilet trained.  The speaker explained this was an extreme lesson in kindness and how to get along.

But back to that hill.  The buses stop at the base of it, and the women and their children who have no cars, must walk the hill, and our speaker did this sometimes two and three times a day.  The residents actually call it Heart Attack Hill.  Our speaker finished her talk saying, she is now free of her abuser, she had received job training, was able to get a job, and she is helping counsel other young women.  One more thing of which she is particularly proud is she has lost lots of weight and is in the best shape of her life, all due to Helpmate, she said, and those walks up Heart Attack Hill.